The Odd Couple II
Notice the itals. Maybe you thought I was referring to two people of my acquaintance who remind me of Felix and Oscar and that I’m about to tell you about this comically mismatched real-life pair. After all, under what circumstances would any non-Ebert have watched the actual 1998 sequel to the 1968 film The Odd Couple? In a word: Greyhound.
Some things are beyond your control on a Greyhound bus: the person sitting next to you will somehow produce an entire rotisserie chicken from her change purse, the person in front of you will recline steeply enough for a gynecological exam, and the least important person in the western hemisphere will carry on an hourlong cell phone conversation. And, if a movie is shown, you will watch it. You have no choice. The monitors are staggered along the ceiling in such a way that you really can’t anatomically avoid a view without a Navy SEAL sneaking up behind you and wrenching your head in a semicircle. (Think of Alex in A Clockwork Orange, but swap ultraviolence for Walter Matthau.) And you have to listen to the movie, too, because it’s broadcast from each and every speaker on the bus. Earplugs are useless, and what’s worse is that the passengers aren’t nearly as outraged as you are. Consider this scene, which got a huge laugh: Felix’s and Oscar’s children are getting married (to each other), but F&O find themselves stranded in the desert because their roadtrip falls victim to a series of hack misadventures. And now, they can’t even remember the city they were headed to!
Oscar Madison: Was it San Marino?
Felix Ungar: Not San Marino, maybe San Quentino.
Oscar Madison: Not San Quentino, San Sorina.
Felix Ungar: No not San Sorina.
Oscar Madison: San Mateo. San Clemente. Roberto Clemente.
Felix Ungar: Sancho Pancho. Pancho Gonzales.
Oscar Madison: Ferrando Lamas, Ricardo Montalban.
Felix Ungar: Ricky Ricardo!
This is a partial excerpt. IMDB left out “Aunt Jemima!”
That is not a joke.
I’ll let you know what I think of Quigley Down Under, which will undoubtedly be shown on my return trip.